Scientists have discovered the key to happiness isn’t finding meaning in your existence, being kind to others, and being comfortable in who you are, but actually just money & alcohol.
A study, funded by the association of drinks manufacturers, found the answer lies at the bottom of a bottle, not in a deep and meaningful post on a random friends Facebook page.
“Enough alcohol to forget about things” Explains Dr Martin, “that’s what puts most people in a good mood. It’s good old fashioned escapism.”
He continues, “Of course enough money to fund your new lifestyle choice is a harder problem to solve, but that’s what payday lenders are for, isn’t it?”